Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Game Changers: Recapping Week 9

It's been a little while. But before we break all of this down, I do need to echo the sentiments of AZ real quick...

With that said, let's dig into some Haus League fantasy football.

This post is entitled Game Changers. Not in the good way. We're talking about Carson Palmer. John Skelton. Tim Tebow.

Dudes that came into the game, ruined valuable fantasy football teams and shitty real football teams. You had Larry Fitzgerald (sorry Pusha), that's cute, meet John Skelton. You thought Eric Decker was a nice waiver wire surprise (sorry me?), shake hands with Tim Tebow. His hand may be five yards behind you. Pause. You had any WR on the Oakland Raiders? Go eff yourself, Boller + Palmer = nothing but T.A.I.N.T.s.

Middling to good fantasy players go down. Teams get ruined. There's the fall off after a team loses a Jamaal Charles. Then there's the week 6, 7, or 8 fall off after your number one receiver is now getting thrown balls by Skelton. I mean, that guy had safeties on consecutive possessions. Forget Fitz or Beanie (sorry Eddie). You just can't count on Cardinals.

With that in mind, we revisit the Week 9 that was in the Haus League -

I got a text from Bougie the other night asking me why I stopped writing about the league. I said I'd start back this week after a few life changes. Keeping in tune with what Bougie does when I write, Bougie helped me out. Lost. To Pusha, Ferris, and Quizno's. I guess you get what you ask for?

Bougie missed Jason Campbell this week. So did Darrius Heyward-Bey. Before the game? Nothing but Hurricane Chris.

After the game? Rocked out to Joni Mitchell all Bougie emo style.

On the other hand, Pusha T and co. benched Phil Rivers and his 33 points but did well enough with Cutler's 20 and a pretty even showing from the rest of the team (6 additional players with 10+ points). Big win for the Re Up Gang.

How did Hawaii get to .500 before this week? No idea, wasn't paying much attention. But after getting to .500, he ran into the buzzsaw that is Lando.

Real quick, though, I'm going to let you in on a quick secret. Some call it a conspiracy theory. I say it's real.

When did the new Drizzy leak? Drake acknowledged it Monday -
Lando leaked that shit. Wait, strike that. Lando sent Hawaii a copy to LTD+ to arrive first thing, after the W was locked down, the ultimate shit talking move. Then, out of pain, anger, general discontent, Hawaii leaked that joint. Maybe the most G boasting we've seen in the Haus League yet from Lando, the same dude who dropped the heat rock Comeback Season. Warning to whoever faces Lando in the playoffs - he may just shoot you the Drizzy - Rozay mixtape "You Only Live Once"the day before that tape drops. Don't say I didn't tell you.

To the nuts and bolts of it, here are some things to note. 1) Hawaii will never get 65+ from Ryan, Helu, and Marshawn. Ever again. 2) Lando found a way to get the win on Killa Cam's bye week (kudos), leaning on B. Marshall and The Race to get it done.

Isenberg continues to not be able to catch a break, taking an L in the closest matchup of the week. The kid had Brady and Welker in their early glory days of 2011, and is now fortunate enough to be also counting on Gore and Forte who have been having great years past their expected weeks 1-4 success. One player who hasn't continued being good past weeks 1-4? Scott Chandler. The only issue is Isenberg's backup for him is Ben Watson. Maybe that would work in 2008?

On the Complex side, their streak continues. After falling to 2-3, they've rattled off four straight. I was going to detail the exact ways they did it, but I didn't have the time to put together a 50 slide slideshow. Maybe next week. Really, though, Plex was able to continue a solid run despite Schaub, Dez, and Malcolm Floyd for a combined 15. Jake Ballard continues to impress, proving a better look than Kellen at the TE spot.

So maybe Chris Johnson and LeGarrette Blount were not the answer to my ills. Granted Jahvid, who I traded with Vick for those two RBs, got hurt, but I was then down to Flacco which pushed me to make a move of Nicks for Romo. It's a mess, I'm a mess. I did learn to always use a RB (this week McGahee) against the now version of the Raiders.

The Cats' white knight, Aaron Rodgers, continued to play out of this universe, dropping a solid 38 on my squad. Couple that with the 19th dude to know the real truth about Kim K (before Kris Hump became the 28th), Reggie Bush, playing like he's actually good (he's not), and the Cats were able to nearly squash my team with their efforts and those of Vincent Jackson (35.5). Yikes. If Walter, Clark, and Vinatieri (all white, keeping with the Cats mission statement) had put up anything reasonable, this would have gotten much more out of hand.

Eddie laid an egg. Detroit went on a bye week. Megatron went to get recharged. Jahvid went to figure out if he could play again this season (familiar refrain). Even Vick put up an anemic 9 points. Foursquare overcame this huge point total with a solid 0 from Run DMC and really nobody but Brees showing up this weekend. 82.5 was enough, though, in a rough matchup to follow.

The G Series is thin at RB. Coupling injuries (Ahmad and Ingram) with a who-the-f'-is-he? player Chris Ogbonnaya, Mr. Smith got a combined 0.5 points from his running backs and defense. G Series was actually the only other team that Foursquare would have beaten this week. Beacon of hope Rob Gronkowski (20 pts) was all for naught in an anemic showing for the G Series' second L in a row.

On the Skillshare end of things, Elisha Nelson Manning may be good. Like, real good. Unless he's playing the Seahawks at home. Manning, S Jax, and Heath Miller paced them to the W. Jordy Nelson on the bench would have helped with his 18.5 but wasn't needed this week.

After 9 weeks, the jumbled standings -

See you later this week with the Week 10 preview.