Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Week One Postmortem

A week of action is in the books. After a rousing draft last Tuesday night, the league was ready to start scrapping.

Some big matchups this week, but not before Pusha publicly distanced himself from Quizno's draft strategy. It went something like this -

Which to all affiliated with the group, kind of sounded like -

With no help on the RB front, Pusha T and Quizno's were left to square off against Cats with Gats. And the Re Up Gang wasn't kidding. They need running backs. Starting LaDainian Tomlinson with a straight face is not the move, especially when it means that your flex is Chad "I caught one pass all day even though my QB threw for the most yards EVER on MNF" Ochocinco.

Even with a dominating performance for the Cats by Aaron Rogers, the matchup was close, coming down to Ocho vs. Janikowski. Because we needed a reason to watch both of the MNF games. Ocho was nowhere to be seen while Sebastian lit it up, locking up the Cats' week one win, 97.5 - 91.5.

In typical week one fashion, only one other matchup was close approaching Monday night's games. Isenberg, he of NFL (Not Fantasy) Draft Guide fame, was neck and neck with Naveen's Foursquare squad. And then Tom Brady to Wes Welker happened. And while the nearly 26 points from one play wasn't the entire difference, it effectively ended Foursquare's day. Behind Tom Brady, CI triumphed, 159 - 123.5.

Quick thoughts on the other four games -
  • BMore Careful over Bougie Banton (115.5 - 89) - Yung Berg misses philandering Big Ben. Married Ben stinks.
Word on the street is Berg is hitting up ZipCar and driving Ben straight to Georgia. The combo of Ravens D for BMore and Ben for Bougie proved to be the difference. That and Berg counting on DeAngelo Williams and Ryan Grant to produce in 2011.
  • Lando over Skillshare (167 - 91) - After mocking the league and who everyone was drafting via a live Google Docs spreadsheet throughout the entire draft, Lando backed it up, stacking up the week-high point total. Part of it was good luck (Mike Tolbert?!?) while other parts were solid players producing like they should (we see you, Andre Johnson). On Skillshare's end, we must repeat something. You can't trust Donovan McNabb.
  • Complex over Cytherea's Ark (127 - 83.5) - Complex said it best. Eddie's reach for Megatron worked out to the tune of 23 points. His reach for LeGarrette Blount didn't. Drafted as the hardest dude in the league (so said Mr. Huang), Mr. Blount may need some motivational music this week. Complex, on the other hand, saw an underperforming Matt Schaub get bailed out by LeSean McCoy and a never-to-be-seen-again showing by the 49ers D. Don't count on them playing Tarvaris and the Seahawks every week.
  • G Series over Team LTD (100.5 - 61.5) - The G Series' Smith may not want to rely on just over 100 winning the matchup ever again. But up against the already splintering Team LTD, Matthew Stafford and Aaron Hernandez's showings were enough. LTD has a hard road ahead of it, though, as nobody on the bench showed up, either. That may be why they're already +31 underdogs heading into a week 2 matchup with Cytherea's Ark.

Finally, the first of what will be a season-long series - Oh shit, I left him on my bench?
  1. Chad Henne (QB, Miami) - 37 points (Bougie Banton started Big Ben, 7 pts)
  2. Steve Smith (WR, Carolina) - 33 points (BMore Careful started Joe Addai, 5 pts)
  3. Reggie Bush (RB, Miami) - 18.5 points (Cats started Brandon Jacobs, 2 pts)
  4. Jets D / ST - 21 points (Re Up Gang started the Chargers, 8 pts)
  5. Jordy Nelson (WR, Green Bay) - 16 points (Skillshare started Sid Rice, goose egg)
  6. Cadillac Williams (RB, St. Louis) - 15.5 points (Complex started Rashard Mendenhall, 2 pts)
  7. Stevie Johnson (WR, Buffalo) - 14 points (G Series started Roddie White, 10 pts. Totally defensible)
  8. Deion Branch (WR, New England) - 12.5 points (Foursquare started Jeremy Maclin, 2.5 pts)
  9. AJ Green (WR Cincinnati) - 10.5 pts (Cytherea's Ark started Dwayne Bowe, 2 pts. Again, pretty defensible)
Note: That's right, Isenberg and Lando started the ideal lineups. No entries on this week's list. Also no entry for LTD, but their squad may just stink.

One week down. 12 more weeks to turn your squad around.

We'll be back Friday with this weekend's preview.

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